


Little White Cubes

by bowiesnippleantennae



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Canon, Dream Bubble, F/M, Hopeful Ending, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-29
Updated: 2012-05-29
Packaged: 2017-11-06 06:20:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/415724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bowiesnippleantennae/pseuds/bowiesnippleantennae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The kindness and softness he is showing chokes you up. You know all of the reasons that you are flushed for Karkat. That is the only thing right now that you are so certain about, it hurts more than the memories of your death. But being able to experience firsthand just how caring he is, of how gentle and quiet he can be, you think that even though you are dead, you are the luckiest of all of your time line selves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little White Cubes

Soft feet crunch and slip on tiny white cubes and you look down.

What was the last thing you remember? You remember fear and pain and seeing blue and olive mix and everything is so fuzzy. Your head starts to hurt and you touch your temple with a hiss of irritation. That is when your foot slips and you are propped up on your hands with your bum on the prickly cubes and a foot in the air. You hate this place. Whatever this place is, it's not where you want to be. But you can't seem to remember where it is you want to be-- who you want to see.

You stumble to your feet and steady yourself and that is when you notice what you're wearing. You feel like this is not what you usually wear but it still fits you quite well, like a part of you is attached to these purple garments. The thought is only passing and you get distracted by the scenery. A beautiful yellow sky and white mountains painted in the light. A memory tries to manifest itself again and you are shocked to feel something else push its way through your mind and a shiver runs down your back. It feels imposing like a trespasser.

Turning around, you notice that the sky has changed from your beautiful yellow to a thick red and you can sense someone else is on their way. If you had fur, you know it would be bristling right about now.

A little growl escapes your lips as you scan the land with narrowed eyes. Flexing your claws, you feel like your strife specibi are securely fastened to your hands and when you look down, they are. Purrfect.

Swiftly spinning around on one heel, the little white cubes go flying in different directions as you launch off the ground and pounce the intruder who you could feel was sneaking up behind you. Both of you fly backwards and land harshly on the pointy ground, dragging a deep ditch into the unstable earth. When the cubes settle and you are able to look your prey in the eye, you are met with pure white in gray skin. Realization hits you like a large cargo vehicle that is set on tracks and all of the sudden, the memories come rushing back in a way that makes your head feel like it's splitting in two and you fall back, clutching your own head, unable to even relax your shut eyes, let alone open them.

"H-hey, are you okay?" The intruder shifts under you and you scoot back, waving one clawed hand at him.

"No! Get away! Stop!" You gasp out as you fall backwards.

Through the rush of images that go flashing through your mind, you see your moirail kneeling before another one of your friends, and you can almost taste the fear as you watch the blue seep around one of his knees. He falls over and you are so overcome with rage, you could quite possibly shit a rage snake longer than Karkat's and that is really saying something--

Karkat.

Karkat.

Your eyes suddenly snap open as a hand is placed very softly on your shoulder. You look up at its owner and see short, spiky black hair and stubby nobs but the eyes aren't how you remember them. You scrunch your nose in confusion and tilt your head at him.

"A-Are you..." The words die on your tongue and you feel a lump form in your swallow chute. Your head falls forward as you let out a thick sob that shakes your entire being and the sadness of everything falls down around you like the meteor that took your hive.

"Hey, whoa, s-stop! It's... uh, you don't have to cry, hey. Are you listening to me?" His voice cracks and you look up, blinking through tears and you know he's Karkat. His name escapes your lips and he gives you an unsure half-smile that warms your expanding and deflating blood sac. "Yeah, it's me." And he plops down in the little white cubes in front of you and looks around. "Isn't this your medium?"

You rub at your eyes and sniffle. "Yeah... I remember... coming here with Equius back when we were playing the game..." The tears fight to come out but you force them to stay back as you relive the memory. This would all be so much easier if Equius was here with you. But he isn't.

"Yeah, remembering is good. You gotta keep remembering, okay Nepeta?" His look is stern even with the eerie white eyes. You wonder why his eyes look like that and if he's actually okay. You then notice his outfit.

"Uhm, Karkitt-- Karkat? Is that a godtier outfit? How did you get it? I don't remempurr you reaching godtier."

He looks down at his own shirt and then back up, scratching the back of his head. "Uhhh, yeah... About that." You tilt your head at him and he seems to become quite exasperated. "I guess I should probably bring you up to terms as to what happened to you and what happened to me." You scoot closer because that is all you want right now. Some clarity as to what exactly is going on.

He begins to tell you about how he died. How everyone died. About how he tried to make it through the game and keep everyone safe but certain decisions he had made early on really screwed him over in the long run. How they screwed everyone over. How they weren't meant to succeed because they were all in a doomed time line. He wasn't meant to live longer than he did and neither was anyone else and by the end of the story, you are in tears.

"Hey, will you stop crying, for fuck's sake! We've all come to terms with it. The important part is that there is an alpha time line and that it doesn't get shitted on like all the others. At least one of us has to succeed. We can't be caught in this fucking loop forever." He grimaces and you sniffle back this second batch of tears like a good little girl.

"So... So what happened to me? I mean, the me that you knew in your time line?"

He looks up and you can see distinct sadness spread across his face. The look rips at you like a thousand paper cuts.

"Nep... you really don't want to know what happens in these off-shoot time lines. I only know because Terezi was able to tell me and even then, I wish she hadn't." There is real remorse on his face, just like your own Karkat. Always taking the blame, always putting everyone else before himself, always so selfless and strong and your leader.

There is a long silence while the reality of everything starts to sink in and you remember what you really are. Karkat must see the epiphany on your face because he asks you to talk it out and you oblige.

"I'm... I'm a dream self, from Derse. I'm not the real Nepeta from my time line, I guess."

"She must've not reached godtier."

You nod, your brows furrowing together as the thoughts organize themselves.

"Something out of place... Uhm... Something that didn't belong there came. It was like some sort of monster." You look up at him and he blinks at you. "There was a monster that was all black, with big black wings like a feather beast!" You spread your arms out wide, for emphasis. "And a sword, right... right here." You poke at you own chest. "He took it out of himself, yeah, he took it out and there was all kinds of colors of blood on it and he just... he... he just..." The energy drains out of you and slump down.

"What did he do, Nepeta?" Karkat leans forward and shakes your shoulder lightly.

"He killed all of us. Even the ones who were still asleep." You look up at him, weakly. "And I remember the last thing I saw was a green light. I..." and you notice Karkat looking down, his white eyes big and round and you can already guess what is happening. You peek down and see olive green seeping through your clothes around your mid-drift. You gasp and clutch at your stomach, trying to keep yourself together even though you are still intact. "O-Oh no! Ahh...!"

Karkat clamps a firm hand over yours and your attention snaps to him.

"Calm down, it's okay. It's just the dream bubble changing with your memories. That shit happens sometimes. It... It's usually really awful. Sometimes it's so nostalgic, it hurts. And when you run into someone else in here, you can mix the memories and reminisce, together. But, even that can be really shitty." He looks away with a scowl.

You place your other hand on his and he blinks at you. Surprising even yourself, you are able to give him a small smile and the tension in his face lessens a bit. That is a relief. You've never been able to talk to your own Karkat because he was always sleeping, and even with Rogue attributes, you were only able to go see him, once. The only images of him you can go by are the fuzzy memories of your waking self and the intense feelings she had that seeped into your own when she would go to sleep.

"I think... that this time, even though I cried a little, a-and even though I am feeling very sad and confused about everything, this is... actually, haha." You look down to hide the flush that is spreading across your face. You have just become extremely nervous but you figure that you're dead and when will you get another chance to get it all out? "This is the first time, I've been able to, uh, talk with you face-to-face, ever." And the smile on your face almost hurts as you beam up at him.

He doesn't say anything for a while, but the reddish tint on his cheeks tells you that something is stirring in that adorable head of his.

"I've always wanted to! I would try to make it to Prospit, sometimes but you were always asleep, anyway... At least, in my time line. Uhm, and I would remember things from being awake but it wasn't me, and it's a difficult thing to do, I guess..." You take a large breath and steady yourself. "I think that, this is a very lucky thing to happen to me, and. Uhm, I hope you feel the same way! B-Because, I've... All of the mes that there are, I feel like all of us, have always, always been flushed for you!" You slap your hands over your mouth and blink at him because you didn't think it would come out like that. You hope you didn't creep him out.

He looks shocked and almost scared and you think that he probably couldn't handle fifty Nepetas all flushing hard for him. That the thought is probably really unsettling and that he is going to use his super cool god tier powers to get as far away from your bubble as pawsible.

All of those things are the last things you want to take place right now.

"Is... Is that really true?" You start at his voice and force your spine to relax.

"Yes, it is..."

"And you've been keeping this from me?"

You nod harshly. "I don't think any of us would be able to get the courage to tell you unless there was nothing left to lose. And, and I have nothing left of me..."

His expression softens. "Wow, I didn't really think that it was this serious. I guess, I always got the feeling you were keeping an eye on me and you preferred me over some of the other guys..." Eridan comes to mind and you let out a little giggle and he smiles at you a little. "But, uh... Fuck!" He punches the ground and cubs go flying and you make a little eep sound. "I am so sorry for being such an oblivious asshole and basically ignoring you and making fun of your interests-- like, who the fuck cares if you like roleplaying? At least you were innocent about it and didn't do anything fucked up like our local sociopath! You... You didn't kill anyone. I don't think you could, even if you wanted to."

And that's when a fresh memory hits you in the face and you see yourself behind a vent, watching your moirail get strangled by your other friend. You burst through the vent, claws spread and ready to shred flesh and that's when he catches your wrist. You watch in horror as he drags the tips of your claws across his face and the smile plastered on there is the most chilling thing about this scenario. It doesn't waver or falter or even grow bigger. It stays solid and content and you hate it. Before you can even gather these thoughts, before your hatred bubbles up out of you so that you can fight back, you are struck and lying face down, choking on your own blood.

You blink as the memory goes away and flinch back as a knuckle caresses your chin. You look down and see your own blood on his knuckle and you wipe a little at your lips, bringing your fingers back to reveal that your mouth is dribbling olive green blood. You wipe more frantically and apologize for being gross but Karkat shakes his head slowly.

"It's just the memories coming back, they will pass until you can almost control how much they affect you. It's weird now, but you'll get used to it."

The kindness and softness he is showing chokes you up. You know all of the reasons that you are flushed for Karkat. That is the only thing right now that you are so certain about, it hurts more than the memories of your death. But being able to experience firsthand just how caring he is, of how gentle and quiet he can be, you think that even though you are dead, you are the luckiest of all of your time line selves.

He suddenly stands up and presents an open palm to you.

"Alright, enough of this crying and remembering bullshit. Let's go explore and see what can pop up in your bubble."

Your smile broadens as you take his hand and he pulls you up with ease. You walk through the rubble of cubes and point out every giant teapot you see and you each choose your favorite one and even take turns licking the little cubes because they smelled so sweet and they taste sweet, too! Laughter comes easier and through all this, your hands do not separate.


End file.
